I have come to realize something lately.
I stress about things on a daily basis.
How will I make money?
How will I make a change in the world?
How can I better myself?
I feel like over the past few years, I have spent too much time worrying.
We are born with a blank canvas waiting for us to paint our story on. If you put the entire lifespan of the world in perspective, our time on this planet is minuscule. Why would you waste time worrying, stressing, or trying to fit in or impress people?
Why would you waste time doing anything that does not make you happy?
Why do anything that does not bring you pure joy?
But after I have this in-depth life purpose moment, I begin to feel selfish. And I believe that is because society has not put enough emphasis on one's happiness and stresses the importance of doing something or being something. Shouldn’t I spend this short time on earth helping others or trying to make others happy? Technically yes, but you can not make anyone else happy without truly being happy yourself.
Then I think of where I am in my life right this second and what I am doing. I am in no way living an authentically happy life. And that is something I need and am going to put at the top of my priority list for the rest of ever. But, I am proud of myself. And that is something that feels so weird to say because in society feeling proud of yourself is commonly mistaken with being cocky. And cocky is unattractive, right? Or that’s what they say at least. But how do you evolve and continue to work toward greatness without feeling proud of yourself? So I am proud of myself. I have diverged from what is considered “normal” to do something that makes me. I am fortunate enough to have found something that makes me happy and makes others happy at the same time. How beautiful is that?
If everyone chose to do what they loved and not what they thought they were supposed to do, I believe the joy we would all feel would emit light and joy on others and the world would be a better place.
But what about the money? As I have gotten older I have grown to sort of despise money. I know it is essential to life, but I view it as a demon that drives unhappiness and eternal discontentment. I believe money and the need for status or to be known to create the majority of hate in this world. It fuels jealousy and the constant desire for more. More possessions. More money. More friends. More attention. Just, more.
The want for more distracts us from what truly matters at the end of your life. When you die and your friends and family remember you, they will not speak of how much money you made, your design clothes, or how many followers you have. They will remember the most authentic parts of your being. How you were kind or genuine or happy. Did you illuminate joy in your life? That is what people will remember.
My idea of money used to be so skewed.
“I will be happier when I make $100,000 a year,” I would tell myself. If I ever do make that much, what will miraculously change that will bring me happiness? Nothing!
I am always thinking of the future and how I will be happier when X, Y, or Z happens. If I continue on this path, I will live my entire life wanting to be happy but never truly being happy, and that is my greatest fear.
I read an article the other day that compressed the earth's 3.85 billion years of existence into 12 months. According to this compression, 144 years is comparable to one second in the 12-month hypothetical situation. If you were to live to be 80, your life would be represented as 0.5 seconds out of 12 months. When you put it into that perspective and realize how infinitesimal our time on earth is, does that make you want to change how you are living? Do you want to spend that 0.5 seconds chasing after material items that you think will bring you happiness? Or do you want to live for yourself and actually be happy?